• convinced that all straight girls feel at the least some attraction to ladies
• convinced that your fascination with seeing appealing women/scantily clad women/boobs can be a reaction that is artificial by the objectification of females in media
• Thinking you’re simply a brilliant intense feminist for genuinely reasoning women can be amazing and achieving an overwhelming preference with their business
• Being actually into just exactly how ladies look “aesthetically”/“just as creative interest”/“fashion goals”
• Thinking it is objective and uncontested that nearly all ladies are much more appealing than many males
• Being an extremely intense LGBT+ “ally” and getting weirdly psychological about homophobia but presuming you’re simply an extremely Good Ally and v empathetic
• Having like half your friend team from college grow to be LGBT+
• Getting emotional or having a solid response you don’t comprehend to f/f love tales etc.
• Having had individuals think you had been homosexual whenever you had no suspicion you’re homosexual

Checking out attraction to females

• Experiencing in the man’s position or just never/rarely imagining yourself in the woman’s position
• Really focusing on the women in het porn
• Being really into the idea of kissing/being sexual with a woman ‚to turn guys on’
• Being really annoyed when guys actually do express interest in watching or joining in when you do that
• Only feeling/expressing attraction to or sexual interest in women when you’re inebriated or otherwise impaired like you could live with a woman in a romantic way, even if you can’t imagine doing anything sexual with a woman
• Feeling like you could enjoy sexual interaction with a woman, even if you can’t imagine having romantic feelings for a woman
• Thinking you couldn’t be a lesbian because you’re not attractive enough, cool enough, or otherwise in the same league as most of the women you know
• Interacting with het sex/romance in media by imagining yourself

Gender emotions

• Having lots of conflicting gender emotions which are just feasible to solve once you understand you are/can be described as a lesbian
• convinced that being gnc and feeling a disconnect from traditional womanhood mean you can’t be a lady just because that’s what feels closest to right – many lesbians are gnc and several lesbians feel disconnected from traditional womanhood because it’s so bound up in heteropatriarchy
• Knowing you’re drawn to females and never having the ability to parse that (esp + any sex nonconformance) as homosexual, using quite a long time to find out if you’re a right guy or perhaps a lesbian
• Being dysphoric in regards to the areas of you which make right males think your system is owed for them, needing to find out just what that dysphoria means for/to you
• Wishing straight people and/or males didn’t parse you as a female, but being completely more comfortable with the thought of other ladies seeing you as you of them
• Knowing you’re drawn to ladies, but experiencing weirdly accountable and uncomfortable wanting to connect to them being a right guy, and just smalltits later on realizing you’re actually a trans lesbian
• Knowing you’re homosexual, but experiencing like you’re struggling against comp het stuff – vexation, obligation, fear, disinterest, self-objectification, etc. – when you make an effort to connect to males romantically/sexually, and just later on realizing you’re a trans lesbian and never a homosexual guy
• Being nonbinary and using quite a long time to examine to be able to respect/understand your nonbinary identification along with your lesbianness on top of that

Considering lesbianism

• attempting to be a lesbian but feeling like if you don’t already know just you are one you can’t be
• Feeling alienated from all of the male-gazey unrealistic depictions of lesbians as just being young slim rich white cis abled conventionally appealing sex conforming right actresses in tv/movies/porn and convinced that alienation means you can’t be homosexual
• Discovering that your particular kind is gnc females or ladies who share your underrepresented demographic and that is why you’re certainly not drawn to a-listers
• maybe not experiencing interested in right females but instantly having a lot of crushes once you know without a doubt certain women can be bi/gay
• experiencing accountable about attempting to be considered a lesbian, experiencing like you’re simply attention-seeking or wanting to be stylish
• curbing your lesbian goals since you think exploring that desire will mean you’re a bad/homophobic person making use of lesbianness selfishly
• Wishing you’re a lesbian to flee the vexation of dating guys
• Fantasizing on how much enjoyable it could be to be always a lesbian and simply be with women/a specific girl, but convinced that can’t be for your needs
• stressing that several of your previous attraction to males was actually real which means you can’t be considered a lesbian
• Worrying that bc you can’t be 100% certain you’re maybe not drawn to men and can’t be 100% yes you won’t replace your brain, you can’t be described as a lesbian
• Worrying which you just desire to be a lesbian as a result of injury and therefore means your lesbianness could be Fake
• Worrying that trauma-induced problems in the method that you experience intercourse (age.g., a practice of self-harming via sex w guys or perhaps a fear of/lack of great interest in almost any intercourse after all) suggest you’re maybe not a genuine Lesbian

Every product with this list is frequent among genuine Lesbians. It’s all Normal Lesbian Stuff. If you’re worried which you can’t be considered a lesbian though it’s the life span you really would like on your own, i am hoping this provides you authorization to explore that. You will be permitted to be considered a lesbian.

Of course you took the time to read this entire thing because you’re curious about your identity, if you identified with a bunch of items on this list – you may or may not be a lesbian, but friend, you almost certainly aren’t cishet if you’re not sure yet. Welcome.

(I’d want to hear other activities lesbians want you’d understood had been A Thing once you had been first checking out your identification! )